Big Brother 9 – The Circus Has Come To Town!

Oh, my Lord. Another fantastic array of bimbos, himbos, nerds, geeks and freaks have “gone in” for the summer.

Here’s the rundown:

Dennis

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Camp as! Is a dancer (supposedly). Reminds me of an ugly, fat version of Rufus Wainwright. Oh man, this guy thinks he is SO all that! The man is a troll!

Darnell

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Brit born, but grew up in America. Albino. Has been arrested 5 times (like it’s something to brag about) and never watched Big Brother (reportedly). Despite being albino looks really simian. And he is WHITE, I mean REAL WHITE. When he stands next to the rest of the housemates, woah! So far, the only interesting thing about him seems to be his albino-ness.

Dale

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A true knob! The man said in his VT and I quote “If there is fanny in the house, I’ll nail it”! Eeeewwww, repulsive little sh!t! Gives himself 10/10 for looks (dream on buddy) but 4/10 for generosity – no shit Sherlock! Four is probably scaling it up a bit!

Kathreya (pronounced without the H, so Kat_reya)

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Calls herself the “Cookie monster” as she LOVES cookies. Very bubbly, but kinda infectious. Wants to have her gravestone made of cookies so her family can eat it(!) Originally from Thailand, moved to the UK 7 years ago. A bit Little Britain Ting Tong Macadangdang.

Luke

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20 and a politics student. Knob, but in a different way to Dale, geeky knob. Sexually ambiguous, he likes wearing suits, especially ones he’s bought from ASDA (discount supermarket chain owned by Wal-mart).

Mario (real name Shaun)

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The whole (real name, Shaun) tickles me. Why not just BE Shaun?! He is a serial TV whore. Been on more audience participation shows than you can shake a stick at. Been described by BB fans as looking like a cross between Joey from Friends and Sylvester Stallone. The oldest member of the house at 42. Entered the house with his gf Lisa.

Michael

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Token disabled guy. Was partially blind from the age of 8, been totally blind for the last 10 years. Not sure how he’ll cope in the house and does appear to have a totally unintentional direct way with people. I think he might get himself into trouble/arguments.

There are nine other housemates, most of the female and are either chavs, bimbos or chimbos and I can’t be bothered wasting time on them all. The ones I’ve mentioned are the “stand-outs” for me.

Anyway, I’ve spent more time on this than I planned to and I doubt I’ll be watching any more of it, so that’ll probably be your lot. I’d like to watch it…just for some reason I cannot really fathom. But most of them are SO wafer thin (not as in physically but mentally), I doubt I’ll be able to bring myself to do it. We’ll see.

Kitlers! Schnell!!!

Em was referred to this site by a blogging friend. It has photos of cats that look like Hitler…or Kitlers, as they are called. LOL

Some are just FREAKY!

Check it out here.

Eurovision 2nd Semi-Final

More entertaining than Tuesday night with the added bonus that the UK got to vote for its favourite acts (hence Croatia and Latvia getting through).

Here’s a rundown of the good, the bad and the SSOO bad it’s good!

First off, I have to say I exercised my right to vote and voted for Turkey. A good traditional rock sounding song. They sung in Turkish but it sounded good. The music style was a but Manic Street Preachers. Quite good.
[youtube=http://youtu.be/riMSxOc7ZyA]

Something else not traditionally Eurovision was Bulgaria’s entry. I liked it, but I think it got a little lost in the mix.
[youtube=http://youtu.be/MLLkumF7EkE]

Lithuania was BAD BAD BAD!!! The guy looked like a cross between Potsy from Happy Days and Nick Cave! He belted the song out like Meatloaf and a had a mullet that I haven’t seen since 1988!! Awful awful awful. BE WARNED!
[youtube=http://youtu.be/NDz92qPVTsI]

The Czech Republic did a song called “Have Some Fun”. Probably the most incorrect song title of the night. I won’t even tortue you with a video.

Georgia got through to the final with a song sung by a blind Shirley Manson lookalike called “Peace Will Come”. It was sung in English which (I know I shouldn’t take the “piss” out of someone’s grasp of English, but…) made the song title sound like “Piss Will Come”, which had me in stitches. Tiny things pleasing tiny minds and all that…
[youtube=http://youtu.be/rVMFZu39tmY]

At least the song had a political slant and wasn’t just another boring love song.

Now the “so bad it’s good” category. This belongs to Latvia and Croatia. A haaaarrrrr me maties! Here’s Latvia’s entry! Avast!!! Pieces of eight, pieces of eight!!
[youtube=http://youtu.be/zHLqfkU_0xA]

Croatian entry. 75 cent, you rock!!!!
[youtube=http://youtu.be/KkHL5tULoWw]

Onwards to the final…

Eurovision 1st Semi-Final.

Well there wasn’t as many “gems” as I was hoping for. Of course there was Dustin from Ireland. I don’t think I’ll spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen the semi yet by telling you he didn’t get through 🙁

Estonia was a stand-out. They were singing a song called “Leto Svet”, which by the English translations we were getting on the TV screen was all about having too much food and enjoying the summer light.
[youtube=http://youtu.be/2r2LrMaAquE]

Another stand-out was Bosnia and Herzegovina with a song called Pokusaj by a guy called Laka. Really WEIRD presentation of the song, but the song itself was catchy. I watched a clip of it in English, but it wasn’t as catchy as it was in the native tongue.
[youtube=http://youtu.be/FHlKhhNLo4w]

Belgium’s was a bit funny. The song was done in a “non-language” (IE: gibberish), but it was sort of catchy.
[youtube=http://youtu.be/X5F8ZNMCRB4]

Azerbaijan – I think they thought they were Linkin Park or something. Not my cup of tea. The presenter kept saying one of the guys singing looked like a TV presenter here in the UK, Jonathan Ross. I LOVE the guys window-shattering falsetto at the start of the number though. The presenter last night said something like “If you have pets around at the moment, you might want to watch out”. Amazingly – they got through to the final!
[youtube=http://youtu.be/eo0VrY5C-ow]

I don’t know what was going on with the Finnish entry. I think they were trying to recapture the win they had in 2006 with Lordi. Lordi were a heavy metal act in full masked costumes. They did a song called “Hard Rock Hallelujah” and it was brilliant. This year Finland went for heavy metal again, without make-up and singing in their native tongue. It didn’t really work.

Russia’s song was awful. The guy looked like one of our “pop idol” serial wannabe’s Darius Danesh. They got in the final, but only (I think) from the help of Evgeni Plushenko skating around the stage!

That’s it for now. More gems in the days to come I’m sure. Including the Spanish, Croatian and Latvian entries.

It’s Eurovision Time!!

Man, I love this time of year! Two of my most favourite TV events happen each May. The start of Springwatch, but before that, this weekend is the Eurovision Song Contest. 

Guaranteed to be gayer than Elton John in his Marie Antoinette costume at his birthday. Camper than a row of tents, Eurovision highlights the world of cheesy pop like no other festival can!

It all kicks off tomorrow night. In the UK the first semi-final airs tomorrow night (Tuesday) at 8pm on BBC3. The second semi-final is on Thursday night at 8pm on BBC3. And the final is on Saturday on BBC1 at 8pm. 

In Australia coverage is on SBS all weekend. Friday and Saturday nights have the 1st and 2nd semi-finals on at 7.30pm, with the final airing on Sunday at 7.30pm. 

For those of you wanting to see the show but haven’t got any TV channels in your area showing the contests there will be live webcasts at Eurovision.TV

Anyone having a Eurovision party over the weekend? Have a hoot!

I’m really looking forward to Ireland’s entry.

Can you be British AND Happy?

There was an article on the Daily Express web site yesterday about 40 reasons to be British and happy which tickled me. Some of the suggestions of WHY would should be happy seemed either lame or outlandish – most didn’t even pertain to anything quintessentially British. The forty reasons fall under ridiculous categories as well, which you will see in a moment.

Here’s a run down:
(My replies to the ridiculous ideas are in blue.)

SUMMER FUN

1 Sweaty Betty is offering free running and yoga clubs. All you have to do is check times on its website and turn up! 



Wow! Exercising is NOT my idea of fun, and definitely NOT a reason to be British and happy?!

2 England’s failure to qualify for Euro 2008 has guaranteed a whole summer free of tabloid hysteria and WAGs’ antics.



That’s a load of hogwash. Did they forget that it’s Wayne Rooney’s and Coleen McLoughlin’s wedding in June? WAG’s a plenty I reckon!

3 The opera season at Glyndebourne begins this Sunday with the inaugural performance of Monteverdi’s L’incoronazione di Poppea. 


The venue nestles in a fold in the South Downs and an evening spent at this eccentric private opera house is one of the highlights of the social season. 


Enjoy a picnic on the lawn in evening dress before you disappear back into the modernist interior for a perfect second half. 


Please, give me a break! And what has “enjoying the opera” got to do with being British anyway? Man, these reasons are sssooo lame!

4 It’s less than six weeks to Wimbledon. If you want to go, you’ll have to enter a public ballot, but you can queue up for one of 6,000 daily ground tickets from £5 a person. 

Well, I suppose if you love tennis, it could be construed as ONE valid reason, but you don’t necessarily have to be British to be happy about it. Who came up with this lame list? Oh, Helen Dowd and Jane Warren – neither of which I can find any real info about on the Internet, so why are their opinions so highly rated?


5 Tickets for Royal Ascot – June 17-21 – are on sale and it’s possible to experience all the tradition, pageantry, fashion and style from just £15 per person. Call 0870 727 1234

WTF?

TRAVEL


6 It’s the perfect time to plan a camping holiday or car-free trip the weather can’t spoil at Center Parcs. Race bikes through hundreds of acres of woodland, splosh in the pools and try everything from abseiling to zip wires. Harassed mothers can relax in the Aqua Sana spa. Book one of the chic woodland lodges. 



Oh hell, camping holidays! Since when have they been quintessentially British? I suppose if you count “Carry On” films as a true reflection of Britishness, that might be construed. But Center Parcs? The spelling of “center” alone sounds American. Perhaps if it were to a REAL British holiday (concentration) camp like Pontin’s or Butlin’s, then it may just be more British, but it certainly WOULDN’T make you happy. Staying in a complex with loads of families, screaming kids, dirty pools, canteens that serve breakfast between 8am and 8.10am all served up in bomb-shelter areas of the British “countryside” – does THAT sound like fun to you?

7 Visit the world’s best urban beach on Paris’s River Seine: three nights from £188. 


Excuse me, wasn’t this meant to be reasons to be British and happy? Since when did it change to being French and happy?

8 The pound is still very strong compared to the dollar, so there’s still time to fly out to the United States for that shopping trip of a lifetime. This summer, British Airways is offering return flights to the Big Apple from £318.

Have you guys not seen the state of the economy? There’s a little thing going on in the world called “The Credit Crunch”. Who can afford a ” shopping trip of a lifetime” trip to NY? Maybe they should have changed the title of this piece to be “Reason’s to be posh, British and happy”?

FASHION AND BEAUTY


9 It’s the bathing suit over which every woman will be breathing a sigh of relief as she heads for the beach. The Miraclesuit, £135, has hidden underwire, detachable straps and the Miratex fabric will pull in the wobbliest of tummies. 



I’m sorry, but spending £135 on a bathing suit would NOT make me happy. Not unless it could actually make 135 pounds off my body disappear! Geesh!

10 Actress Gwyneth Paltrow might have hailed a revival for vertiginous heels but flats and Grecian sandals are just as trendy for summer. Slip into something much more comfortable from £120.

Again, why would spending £120 on a pair of sandals (when I could get a pair for £6 at Priceless Shoes). That wouldn’t make me happy either!

11 Here’s one fashion relaunch the gents will love as much as the ladies. Wonderbra is releasing a new summer version of its iconic plunging bra, £26. 


Why on Earth would that make me happy? And what’s flippin British about it? Most women have such plastic friggin boobies these days they’d probably A) not be able to fit into a Wonderbra, or B) probably ACTUALLY not need a Wonderbra. And I’m sure that at £26, you’d find them cheaper elsewhere, say like on that “shopping trip of a lifetime” in NY perhaps?


12 There is nothing better than a handbag to make you happy. Primark has brought out a sunshine bright evening bag that not only looks like Chanel but also costs just £6.



Wow! A true bargain, but you are actually promoting counterfeit goods here. Is that right? Maybe it’s quite Brit to wear Von Ditch (I know it’s Von Dutch, but I like the idea that the knock offs would be called Von Ditch) and Blueberry knock-offs? I thought it was Chav, not Brit, maybe Chav and Bit are one and the same these days. 

13 For men, keeping cool in  hot weather will be easier with a pair of Coolers’ pants, designed to keep ­body temperature down. Canterbury Coolers Boxers, £12.99.

Erm, I’m sure if there are any men left reading this article by this point, they have fallen off their computer chairs with ecstasy with the idea of buying a pair of “cool” boxer shorts. I’m sure they have been totally inspired by the article writers’ imagination!

14 Smother yourself in happiness with miracle cream from Guerlain. The Happylogy UltraPenetrating Skin Essence, £51.50 stimulates the release of anti-ageing hormones in skin to plump and smooth your complexion. Details: 01932 233887.



Oh, you seriously ARE taking the biscuit now! You guys obviously didn’t see the Dispatches programme the other night highlighting the total waste of finances that “beauty” creams are? I might as well light a £50 note and watch it burn, it would be more fun!

15 For beauty lovers who want to bag a bargain, Balaton’s face mask comes with a freebie – buy a 100ml pot and get a free Balaton spa travel bag with six travel products worth £24.99.

Oh, Hallelujah! Watch me spin myself round til I’m dizzy with this fantastic piece of information. Again, I hate to state the obvious, but what does this have to do with being either A) British, or B) happy?

Btw, at this point, is it just me, or is there a STRONG marketing thread to this piece? Surely this has now become an advertising editorial, no?

ASTROLOGY


16 In astrological terms, an auspicious August beckons. “The next new moon eclipse on August 1 in Leo should be really fun,” says Deike Begg from the Association of Professional Astrologers International. 

“Leo is the sign of fun, it will make everyone happier and herald the start of a new adventure. Futhermore, between August 13 and 14, Jupiter – the planet of good fortune – and Venus – the party planet – are forming a 120 degree angle which will be very good fun, and especially so for Capricorns and Virgos.” 

This is followed on August 16 by a full moon eclipse. “A great day for celebrations, such as weddings and christenings,” she adds. 


OK, I’ll wait and see what happens in August. Maybe we WILL have a reason to be British and happy, but I dare guess by the predictions only if you ARE a Leo, Capricorn or Virgo. I’m a Scorp, go figure!


17 Cardiff University researcher Cliff Arnall reckons June 24 is the happiest day of the year because of the likelihood of good weather coupled with the prospect of some time off. 


Hhmm, I think I might just let you have that one. It took until number 17 to get what could actually be a valid reason to be British and happy. Will there be any more?

FOOD AND DRINK
18 What would summer be without strawberries? Get some expert guidance on growing your own. For new and interesting recipes, visit www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes. 


It’s pretty shit if you hate strawberries or are allergic to them. Ian Hislop hates them (and he’s pretty damn British and smug (IE: most likely happy too). My niece is allergic to strawberries (not that she’s British, but she’s happy).

19 For veg lovers, British asparagus is in season. The British Asparagus Association is holding a festival to celebrate on May 25-26.


Well, again, like the strawberries. But it’s almost good for me, as I do like asparagus, I just can’t afford to buy them :-(


20 It’s picnic time once again and Tio Pepe is offering the adventurous an opportunity to ditch the dull cucumber sandwich. Chef Mark Hix has created the Gourmet Grazing Box with a delicious combination of chorizo, wild boar prosciutto, olives and manchego cheese. 

Sounds nice, but how much is it?



21 Who can resist a cool glass of Pimm’s? The classic summer drink has had a revamp with a host of new recipes on the Pimm’s web wite.

Who can resist a glass of Pimm’s? Me! That’s who.

22 The National Taste Festivals kick off on May 29 in Edinburgh and continue through June and July. Gary Rhodes, Antony Worrall Thompson and Tom Aikens are among chefs appearing.

Well, another thing that sounds alright, especially if it’s free (that I highly doubt). Ok, you’ve got two now (possibly three)…not 22!

BEST BUYS


23 Curry’s sale is on with HD ready digital LCD TVs reduced by up to £200 and free delivery on orders over £150 – all ready for a sporting summer. 



WTF? What has this got to do with anything. Oh, yes, of course. I keep forgetting this is an advertising editorial.

24 Superdrug has cheap suncream on sale at £6.99, with a buy-one-get-one-free offer. 




£6.99 is NOT cheap suncream. ASDA have a 200ml 15+ SPF sun lotion for £1.11, now THAT’S cheap. Shit, I keep forgetting it’s an advertising editorial. I wonder how much Superdrug paid for their mention here…?

SCIENCE


25 Happy people are healthier than pessimists, says a study of 3,000 adults by University College, London. Upbeat folk have lower levels of cortisol, a “stress” hormone that can contribute to higher blood pressure, obesity and lowered immune function.


A useful piece of information. Can’t you be happy AND a pessimist though? Being pessimistic doesn’t necessarily mean you are stressed. 
Anyway, I like to consider myself an optimistic realist. Perhaps you can have 4, but maybe not if you are truly ill, you can’t just “snap out of it” as the suggestion implies here. It’s like they are saying, “just be happy for f*ck sake!”

26 A daily dose of chocolate is good for your heart. British scientists have developed a bar that can lower cholesterol. A team at the University of East Anglia has created a sweet treat that retains higher levels of antioxidants, called flavonoids, which are healthy.



Now you are actually beginning to talk my language. But why I need to be British for this baffles me. I know it’s not what the article says but it’s what it implies. Why not just have called it “40 reasons to be happy, or British or happy”? I don’t know, I just don’t get the whole Brit side of it so far.

27 Ninety will soon be the new 60 thanks to medical advances that will transform the diseases of old age. Alzheimer’s may soon be curable and most cancers are likely to be treatable. 


Pardon? We’re going to live longer. We should be happy about that? I’m really not getting this list sometimes. If they’d found the secret to the fountain of youth, I could understand. My mum has been in pain for years, people have health problems at 60. If that means it stretches out for another 30 years, why on Earth should that make people happy? I don’t get it! And as for medical advances, if we still can’t cure the cold…


28 It will soon be possible to replace old, worn out organs with custom-grown ones. “Within a few decades, we are likely to be able to slow ageing itself, which could even lead to life beyond 120,” says futurist Peter Schwartz. 



That sounds like my absolute idea of hell. Who’s going to look after all these “old fogey’s”? Certainly not the youth of today.

CHILDREN


29 It’s the time to plant sunflower seeds and see who can nurture the tallest. 

Oh, FFS!!!
This has got to be the lamest one so far. Especially for kids. They don’t want to be planting sunflowers. They want to be playing GTA4 for 28 hours of the day.


30 London’s West End theatres are opening their doors to children aged five to 16 for free shows, activities and workshops. The Kids Week event in August will encourage youngsters to get involved. 
 

God, that’s almost a good one. Try dragging your kids along to one though…


31 The Playhouse Disney Live! tour kicks off in London on May 29 at the Hammersmith Apollo. Mickey, Goofy and their friends will be travelling the country until late June. 



Yawn…and what, prey tell, does this have to do with Britishness again?


OUTDOORS


32 It’s the village fete season. Drinks company Innocent is holding one in Regent’s Park in London on August 2-3 and has compiled a list of others going on around the country. 



Lord help me. Again, it costs money. When has it ever cost money to go to a fete? And the word fete? Not British, but French. So fete’s, as a rule, are not uniquely British…

33 Britain’s beaches are the cheapest places to hire a sunlounger in Europe, costing an average of £2.50 a day compared to £10 in French hotspots, according to The Expedia Deck-Chair Index. 


And why would you need a sunlounge? And why not just take your own? And, have you thought they are cheaper to hire here, ‘cos no-one wants to go to “our” beaches?! A nice little advert for Expedia though…”Let yourself go!”  – sang in a Felix the Cat meets Ethel Merman style (a bit of an in-joke for me and Em).


34 Late spring transforms hedgerows, meadows and woods. Foxgloves are about to appear, caterpillars are emerging and will soon turn into butterflies, and swallows and woodpeckers can be seen. 



Friggin hell! Amazing! I think this might actual be number 4 or 5 on the TRUE reasons to be British and happy list! I can’t fault this one…

35 The National Gardens Scheme is encouraging us to get out into the garden this Spring bank holiday. More than 200 gardens across the country will be throwing open their gates to the public from May 24-26.  



Again, one I actually cannot fault. Number 5-6 on the true list.

36 The days will keep getting longer until June 21, the summer solstice, when summer begins. 

Another true reason to be thankful.




CULTURE


37 The Royal Shakespeare Company’s summer season includes performances of The Taming Of The Shrew, The Merchant Of Venice and A Midsummer Night’s Dream in Stratford-upon-Avon, with Romeo And Juliet being toured throughout the country.  


Woah! They’re on a role here. Not my cup of tea (something not mentioned but wonderfully British), but Will’s IS as Brit as they come and Shakespeare in the park in summer is an overtly British thing to do, and probably something to be happy about.


38 May is Museums And Galleries Month in Wales and there are events happening across the country to celebrate it. Many are letting visitors in for free. 



Why is this restricted to Wales? Good though…

39 Liverpool’s annual Summer Pops, running from June 28-July 31, will be the biggest yet this year. Artists such as Blondie, Duran Duran and the Sugababes will be performing as part of the city’s European Capital of Culture celebrations. 



If it’s free, it’s good.

40 Tickets are now on sale for the Hampton Court Palace Festival from June 3-21, set in the magnificent surroundings of the palace. Forget muddy music festivals, at Hampton Court there will be picnics and classical music performances. Call 0844 412 2954.



Hhhmm, sounds OK. I think I’ve tallied up less than 10 actual true, valid, good reasons to be British and happy there. The rest is an old load of codswallop!!!

Furkan Hell!!!

I saw this guy’s name on the BBC London news and just HAD to flip back on the PVR and capture an image of his name!

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Globesity – The New “Buzzword”.

Where have we got this sudden desire to merge words to make a new one from? All this Brangelina/Bennifer stuff is just weird.
Anyway, I digress.

This word, reportedly first used by a writer at the World Health Organization, in an article about the “global obesity epidemic”, is increasingly being used to describe the state of the 1st world’s health.

The figures ARE worrying. Despite the fact that I’m some 130-odd kilograms in weight myself, and therefore a “globesity” statistic, I do suffer the mentality of “well, I don’t want to live until I’m 110, so I’ll eat what I damn well like, thank you very much!”. But I really would like to be healthier in the here and now. I might not want to prolong my life, but I’d like for it to be a better quality of life at the moment.

I am old enough to remember (sadly) a time when food was still not as readily available as it is now. Supermarkets when I was growing up seem to only really have the basic things. Fruit and vegetables (nothing exotic mind…and only things “in season”…which is not something you have to worry about anymore – big “up” to food miles!), bread (white and brown, that was it – pretty much anyway), butter and marg (although margarine was pretty low quality then), milk (in cartons or bottles), some sweets/lollies…not at the stock levels we have these days though, nowhere NEAR those levels. And I’m pretty sure that, until the early to mid 1980’s the supermarkets in Oz didn’t sell meat. You still went to the butcher for your meat. My mum refused to by meat from the supermarket until into the 1990’s and then she would only buy small amounts. Now, if she wanted to, she probably couldn’t find a butcher to buy from!

It was an absolute TREAT for us (me, my siblings, kids around my street and local area) to get any kind of sweets. You felt really special if you were allowed to buy something off the ice cream man (who would come around at least once a day, most likely twice, three times on weekends, and during the Xmas summer holidays, they might as well have parked in the street they seemed to come around so often!!). A BIG treat was an ice cream, perhaps a paddle pop (they only use to cost 20 cents!), or a bubble-o-bill (about 30-40 cents). The biggy was a gaytime – that was the creme de la creme of ice cream treats. I think they were a whopping FIFTY CENTS when I was in single figures, but 50 cents was a big deal! But we’d be more than happy with a 5c or 10c bag of lollies (sweets). You didn’t expect these things every day. Half the time you’d be too afraid to ask, cos you know your mum would go MENTAL if you even asked. Pester power was NOT going to work on our war/post war baby mothers!

Now it’s so readily available and affordable that we’ve had a generation of kids that have been given chocolates and sweets as pacifiers. Cry = get a bar of chocolate.

Food was much simpler as well. Post-war, what could you buy? Milk, sugar (in limited quantities), eggs (again – limited…no eggs at all during the war), butter, limited meat, fruit (only seasonal, and limited), vegetables (seasonal), tea. If you wanted bread, you made it. It was like that for a long time.

Even while I was growing up, we had lots of casseroles and soups and stews. My mum was always making Irish stew and home-made friend rice. To have a Chinese take-away was an extra special treat. Half the time you had to go to the restaurant, there was no “take-away” as such. Not being delivered to your door anyway. I think I was around 12. We (my family) went to a Japanese restaurant in Sydney for my mum’s 45th birthday. I remember trying sashimi, only a taste. It wasn’t something I ordered…no way. Raw fish – are you kidding?!!! I’d not even had a take-away curry until I moved here to the UK.

Most nights as I got older, into my teens, we’d still have just a meal of meat and 3 veg. On a really lazy day you might have take-away fish and chips, or a burger and chips. But even then, the burgers weren’t McDonalds slop. It was a burger from the local milk bar, made with a fresh meat pattie, fresh bun, filled with lettuce, tomato, onion (I didn’t have onion then), beetroot (yes! beetroot on a burger – it is delicious), maybe cheese. If we made them at home, we’d even have an egg on there. One hamburger was a complete rounded meal…not a bun of artery hardening slop. You wouldn’t know it to hear of my size…but I rarely have take-away/fast food. My downfall is sweets – chocolate, lollies, cakes and crisps.

I think food is now too readily available. It’s too easy to get, with supermarkets open 24/7. I think supermarkets contain far too much stock these days, and are far too over-sized (I think the increasing size of the supermarkets are in line with the size of the obesity problem). I don’t have a problem so much with the opening hours, more the size of these supermarkets. I’m sure walking the length of one of these “super” supermarkets is the only exercise some people get – me included!!

And we have the genetic problem in us. We (as humans) veritably starved for thousands of years and our bodies are designed to crave fat and sugar. And now with the over-processing of food, all we’ve put in to processed food is fat, sugar and salt.

I think we need to design a pill that rectifies what is now a genetic flaw or defect (IE: the bodies fixation in obtaining fat/sugar). A pill to tell the body that fat/sugar is no longer wanted or required. Not at the rate it needed anyway. We’ve gone from our bodies not getting this stuff, only in very limited quantities in fits and starts, to having a balanced, stable intake of it, to – LOOK OUT, HERE IT COMES, in the last few hundred years. The last phase – from balanced to LOOK OUT – in the last 50 years!! It’s pretty bad.